You know, I just wrote out a giant big long blog post full of observations of my mental patterns and emotions and causes and effects. In it I poured my doubts and worries and even a few confessions. I went back and applied a constant metaphor, and even put some fun sentences in there which painted marvelous pictures of hatred, insecurity, and hopelessness.
But then I got back to working on a little project for somebody I love's graduation...
And I remembered that no matter what, I've got people who love me. And even if that net of safety is going to unravel, people love people for a reason... it means there's something in me. Something good. Something that I can hopefully tap into and use for my own good, rather than luring people in once they're all gone for good.
Sounds sorta sad, I suppose, now that I've written it out... but it's actually a great hope to me.
All of this sadness is going to seem so pointless one day. But I will always cherish these blessed people whom God so graciously decided to place in my path.
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